Bright Lights
by drarryismypassion
Summary: Cas and Dean were happy. At least for a while. Dean screws up and this is his was of trying to fix it. Rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural or any of its characters.. unfortunately.

Hey guys! So, this is actually complete so I will be able to update regularly. I'll post something again on Friday if I get the chance! If not it will be soon after!

Enjoy!

Chapter 1

They were happy, at least for a while. Dean Winchester and Castiel Novak were perfect for each other in every way. Where one had flaws the other flourished. Where one was weak the other was strong.

When Dean admitted he had a problem with alcohol, Castiel quit drinking to help make it easier for Dean. When Castiel was terrible in social situations, Dean swooped in and saved the conversation. Nothing ever came between the two of them.

Even their families liked each other. Castiel's siblings could often be found with Dean, even if Castiel was not around. Dean's brother, Sam, considered Castiel his best friend. Their parent's loved the boys and their relationship.

The boys had known each other since middle school. They met when Dean witnessed Castiel being bullied for his social anxiety. He stepped in and immediately punched Alastair Nixon in the jaw. Castiel had thanked him briefly before trying to run off. Dean had stopped him and asked him to join him for lunch. They had been friends ever since.

Things didn't change until their junior year of college. After a year of parties and girls, they decided to buckle down and actually study. They shared a dorm and took most of the same classes, so of course, Dean and Cas spent a lot of time together. One night in particular changed everything for the best friends.

It was Dean's birthday but, because of a huge exam the next day, they decided to stay in and just have a few beers in celebration. A few turned into a case which turned into the boys being pretty shitfaced. They were both sitting on Cas's bed and simultaneously leaned in and kissed. And just like that, Dean and Cas went from best friends to boyfriends.

When Dean told Sam and his mom, Mary, they exchanged a look and Mary pulled $50 out of her wallet for Sam. She thought it would be another year before they realized their feelings for each other. Sam knew better. Dean just wished his dad had been there. He wanted to know what John would have thought, but he died the year before in a car crash.

Cas telling his family went a bit different. He gathered his siblings in the living room and when he broke the news Gabriel, his second oldest brother broke out in a victory dance exclaiming "It's about damn time!" Balthazar had congratulated him like he had just won an Oscar and Anna burst into tears because "now I can never date Sam!" and ran to her bedroom. Nick, Castiel's oldest brother, started in on him about protection and safe preparation in male intercourse before Cas got pissed and stormed off. When he told his parents, fearing their reaction, Chuck told Cas he was happy for him and Pamela just smiled and told Castiel she was proud of him and hoped him and Dean luck.

After that, their relationship progressed as any other would. They waited a few months to have sex, getting to the new dynamic in their relationship. They officially moved in together after graduation. One year after that, they were engaged and a year after that they were married.

Everyone in Durham, North Carolina believed that they would be one of those couples to go down in history as having one of the greatest love stories in the history of the small town. For the first six years of their marriage, this was the case. Then things started deteriorating.

It was small things at first, things they never had problems with; fights about where to eat, arguing about doing chores. Then the fights got bigger and more intense. Cas started getting mad at Dean about how much Dean went to the Roadhouse to drink, and Dean having gone to rehab in the past only made things worse. Dean started ranting about how much Cas worked. Their arguments went from being private to public and soon everyone knew they were having problems.

It was the day before their eight year anniversary that things came to a head.

It was a hot July day and Castiel had been at work for 17 hours. He was exhausted when he walked through the front door. It was late, nearly 2 in the morning, and he just wanted to go to bed. Since he and Dean hadn't been sharing a bed lately, he went to his own room and changed out of his suit. He decided to check in on Dean before going to sleep for the next 4 hours.

He opened the door to Dean's room and froze. There was a blonde in the bed curled around his husband and, from what Cas could see, both of them were naked. He walked over to the bed and stood there for a moment staring at the face of the man he loved. No matter how many problems they were having lately, Castiel would always love Dean. And right now, in this moment, he felt like his heart was shattering.

Not wanting to wake Dean and the mystery blonde, Cas quietly left the room. He went to their shared bathroom and vomited. He brushed his teeth and sunk to the floor, tears of agony streaming down his face. He stayed like that for hours, wondering what had happened to push them this far apart.

Hearing someone stir in the bedroom, Cas got up from the floor and walked out of the bathroom, bodily running into someone as he started out the door.

"Oh, hey Cas, I didn't expect you to still be home. You're normally at work by now." Dean grumbled quietly.

"Hello, Dean. Is that why the blonde is still in your bed right now?" Cas questioned Dean, a hint of anger in his voice.

"What… how…" Dean sighed. "Cas, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to bring her home last night. I was just drunk and you know how she feels about me and she kept hitting on me… and then I woke up and we were naked in bed together. I know that's not an excuse but it's the truth. I love you and I would never intentionally do anything to hurt you. You know that right?" Dean was getting frantic and his eyes were beginning to water.

"Wait, who's in your bed Dean?"

"That would be me," a voice said from behind Dean. Cas looked over Dean's shoulder and saw Joe Harville standing there, wearing nothing but Dean's favorite AC/DC shirt, the same shirt Cas used to wear.

"J.. Joe?" Cas breathed out, "What the fuck!? You intentionally slept with my husband?! Get dressed and get out of my house. NOW!" Castiel was yelling by the time he was finished.

"I'm not going anywhere. Dean wants me here. Right, Dean?" Joe turned her blue eyes to Dean, smugly expecting him to back her up.

"You should go. I was drunk and last night was a mistake. I'm sorry, Joe." Dean said all of this without even turning to look at the younger woman. She huffed and stomped back into the bedroom, getting dressed angrily.

"Fuck you, Dean Winchester. Don't you dare step foot in my mother's bar again."

A/N Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it!


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Hey guys! Here's the next chapter! There is only one more after this!**

 **Hope you enjoy!**

Chapter 2

After Joe left, Dean looked at Cas with sorrow in his eyes. "I'm so sorry, baby. I didn't mean for it to happen. I was drunk."

"Is that supposed to make this all better? You were drunk so you expect me to forgive you, just like that?!" Cas couldn't believe what he was hearing right now.

"No, I know you won't forgive me. I just want you to know that I didn't mean to do this. Baby, please believe me." Dean had reached out for Cas' hand but Cas snatched it away before he could reach it.

"Oh I believe you Dean. I 100% believe you when you tell me you went to the Roadhouse, again, and got plastered, again, and did something stupid, again. I could barely handle this when your stupidity caused you to get into a fight. But this, Dean? This is a new low. I always believed you when you said you would never do something like this to me. How was I so stupid? I'm leaving, Dean. I can't do this anymore. I want a divorce." With that said, Castiel shoved past Dean and into his room, slamming and locking the door behind him. He ignored Dean pounding on the door begging him to think this over and not make any rash decisions. Packing a bag, Cas looked around the room that had been his alone for the last 13 months. His eyes landed on his favorite picture of him and Dean.

It was from their wedding day. Dean had worn a black tux, Cas a white one. That had been the best day of his life. He remembered thinking about the future and being excited to be able to spend the rest of his life with his best friend. Looking back now, Cas wished they were still as happy as they had been. He grabbed his bags and left the room, taking a deep breath before opening the door.

"Baby," Dean was openly crying now, "please don't go. We can work this out. I promise I'll stop drinking, I'll go to AA meetings, we can get counseling and we can make it work. Just please," his voice broke and the started sobbing, "please don't leave me Cas. I don't know what I would do without you. I love you so fucking much."

During Dean's pleas, Cas had begun walking down the hall to the front door. He turned around and leveled Dean with a glare he was sure Sam would have been proud of. "You 'love me so fucking much'? Really, Dean. If you loved me that much you wouldn't have had sex with JOE HARVILLE in OUR bed. If you 'love me so fucking much', you wouldn't have started drinking again after we put in so much effort to get you sober. You're fucking pathetic Dean. I wish I had of left when I moved into the spare room. Maybe then this wouldn't hurt so fucking much." Cas' voice was laced with venom.

Dean, who had never heard Cas talk like that, much less have that much anger directed at him, stumbled back into the wall and slid to the floor, sobbing and muttering "I'm so sorry" over and over.

Cas turned away from the love of his life and walked out of the door. He called his boss, Naomi, and told her he wouldn't be coming to work today. She told him to take as much time off as he needed. He hung up and headed to see the only person he wanted to be around right now.

Gabriel woke to the sound of someone pounding on his door. He rolled out of bed, trying not to wake the woman lying in his bed. The pounding continued to get louder so he hurriedly put on his robe and ran to the door.

"Holy fuck! I'm coming. Chill the hell out." He opened the door and suddenly had an arm full of his distraught little brother. "Cassie… Cas what's wrong?" He ushered his bawling brother inside and noticed he was carrying luggage bags.

"Cas, what did Dean do?" He knew only one person could upset his stoic brother like this.

"He.. last night… Joe… Roadhouse…" Cas burst into a new fit of hysterics while trying to explain what was going on. Gabe ushered him into the living room and, once he was settled on the couch, went to make him a cup of tea.

"Cas. Take deep breaths and drink this. Slowly. After you calm down you can tell me what has you this upset so early in the morning." He wrapped a blanket around his brother's shoulders and rubbed comforting circles on his back, waiting for Cas to calm down enough to talk.

When it finally happened, Castiel's voice was so devoid of emotions, it scared Gabriel. "Dean went to the Roadhouse last night, got drunk, and slept with Joe Harville in our bed. I found them asleep together last night."

"What? Oh my God, Cassie. What the fuck? I'm going to kill that son of a bitch." Gabriel got off the couch and headed to the front door.

"Please don't." That was all it took to stop Gabe in his tracks. "I know he deserves it. But.." Cas' voice broke, "but I need you right now Gabe. I need my big brother." At his confession, Cas started sobbing again. Gabe immediately went to him and wrapped him in his arms.

"Baby brother, I'm so sorry this happened. I'm going to text the others and get them to come over." He pulled his phone out of his robe pocket and sent out a mass text.

 **Gabe: Dean fucked up bad. Cas is here. Need all of you ASAP!**

Moments later his phone chimed letting him know he had multiple messages.

 **Balthazar: Be there in 10.**

 **Anna: I'm at work. I'll let my boss know and I'll be there.**

 **Nick: on my way. do i need to kill a bastard?**

Gabriel sighed, thankful all of his sibling lived so close. He knew Cassie needed all of the support he could get right now. He untangled himself from his younger brother and, after assuring him he would be right back he walked to his room to get dressed. He woke his girlfriend of 9 months, Kali, and told her what was going on and kindly asked her if she would mind leaving so that Cas just had family around. She agreed and left quietly, trying not to disturb the upset man.

Thirty minutes later, Gabriel's living room was filled with his siblings, all of them there to comfort their brother. They had brought blankets and pillows and made a pile in the floor, wrapping Cas in warmth and familiarity. Dean had tried calling Castiel's phone multiple times, so Nick had taken the phone and turned it off.

The siblings stayed that way for a few hours, until the lack of sleep and overactive emotions caught up with Castiel and he finally fell into a fitful sleep. Gabe, Balthazar, Nick and Anna all moved into the kitchen so as not to wake him up.

"What the hell was Dean thinking?" was the first thing Anna said, pacing through the kitchen.

"I don't think he was thinking, Anna. If he was he never would have done this to Cassie." Gabe sighed.

Nick growled, his eyes glowing with rage. "All Cas has to do is say the word and I will make that asshole disappear."

"You know he's not going to do that. No matter what happened, Cas still loves him. Even when they were fighting, Cas did everything he could to make Dean happy again. Meg might have been Cas' first love in high school, but Dean was his great love, the love that people write novels about." Balthazar truly felt for his little brother. He always thought, out of all of them, Castiel had the best chance at love. He was so deeply caring and kind. He didn't understand what had gone wrong between the two, but he knew that Cas had never given up hope. That no longer seemed to be the case.

"I fucking know that. That's what makes this so damn hard. I want to go over there and beat Dean into a pulp, but I know that if I do, Cas will never forgive me." Nick was nearly whispering at the end.

"Look, Nick. We all want Dean to hurt as much as Cas is. But, for Cas' sake, you can't go all Lucifer on him like you have everyone else who has hurt any of us. That would hurt Cas even more." Gabriel was trying to calm his brother down.

"I KNOW THAT! That's why I'm still sitting here right now." Nick didn't want to be told again how bad doing what he wanted to would hurt Cas.

"Guys, can you please stop talking about this? I just want to forget about it for a while." Cas pleaded from the doorway. Their talking had woken him up and he looked like a mess. He had dark circles under his eyes, his hair was in worse disarray than it usually was, and his clothes were horribly wrinkled.

"Cassie, we're sorry. We didn't mean to wake you, little brother." Gabriel apologized.

"It's ok. Can.. can we do something like we used to do, like when we were kids? I want to get my mind off of this right now." Castiel wanted nothing more than to forget about everything.

Nick was the first to speak, "Of course Castiel. What do you want to do?"

"Let's go to the beach." With that, all of the Novak siblings gathered towels and beach gear, loading into Nick's SUV and made their way to the beach.

Unfortunately, to get there, they had to pass by Dean and Cas' house. Cas tried not to pay attention, but he couldn't help but stare longingly at the house that held so many memories, both good and bad.

The Novaks spent the rest of the day playing at the beach, fighting over who could push whom into the water the most, walking along the shoreline, and picking up shells. Castiel was sufficiently distracted and actually had a lot of fun. After eating at a restaurant right on the dock, they made their way back to Gabriel's. It was dark by the time they made it to the edge of town.

As Nick drove back by his little brother's house, everyone gasped. The house was lit up like the 4th of July. Every light inside the house was on, and Dean had apparently gone to the garage and pulled out the white Christmas lights. The house glowed brightly, looking like a beacon, beckoning to someone. They all knew who it was for.

 **Thank you for reading! I will try to get the last chapter up Wednesday.**

 **Reviews make me happy!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Alright guys, this is the last chapter of Bright Lights! Enjoy!**

Chapter 3

A week later, Castiel had to go back to his house. He had packed in a hurry and didn't have any of his suits with him for work. He had told Naomi what had happened and she told him not to come in for at least a week. He had to go back to work in the morning, so he needed clothes.

He tried to go when he knew Dean was usually at work, but when he pulled into the garage, he saw Dean standing at the front of his '67 Chevy Impala working on it. He cursed his luck and climbed out of his car, not saying a word to Dean.

Dean heard Cas get out of the car and instantly put down his tools and went to his husband. "Cas, baby, please tell me you're back to stay. This last week has been the worst of my life. I can't make it without you baby."

"You should have thought about that before sleeping with Joe." Cas replied coldly, walking into the house. He went straight to his room and collected all of the things he would need for work for a few weeks.

"Can we please talk Cas? I just.. I don't want you to go." Dean begged. "I know we can work this out baby."

"No, we can't talk right now. I need a break, Dean. I have been miserable for over a year now and I just need to take some time to be happy. I've forgotten who I am without you. I'm leaving, and I don't know if I'll ever be back." Cas pushed past Dean and was almost to his car before he remembered the lights. "What's with the lights Dean?"

"I'm leaving the lights on, in case you ever decide to come back home. If I ever start forgetting, I'll turn them off one by one, so that you can see I agree that it's over." Dean seemed hesitant to admit that to Cas.

"I appreciate the gesture, Dean. But you're wasting your time. I'm not coming back. I love you more than anything in this world, but you hurt me one too many times. I can't do this anymore." With that, Cas got into his car and left, not once glancing back to see the stricken expression on his husband's face.

August:

Because Castiel was staying with Gabe, he had to drive by his house on the way to work every day. Going to work that Monday, he didn't see anything out of the ordinary. He spent his day working, not letting his mind drift to anything else. At the end of the day, his boss came in and told him how sorry she was for what had happened, but told him he needed to go home.

He left the building and went to his car. Driving to Gabriel's apartment, Cas wasn't really focused on his surroundings until he drove past his house. Dean was sitting on the front porch and the house was as lit up as the previous week. Out of habit, he almost pulled into the driveway. Realizing what he was doing, he sped off and made his way to his brother's place.

October:

Castiel had finally gotten his own apartment. He loved his brother, but he didn't want to be a burden, not matter how many times Gabriel assured him he wasn't.

It was nice having his own space again. He still had to drive by his old house every day, and the lights always reminded him of what Dean had said.

Nothing had changed in the first month of the lights being on. Every time Cas drove by at night, the house was so bright he could see it from two blocks away. It made Castiel sad to drive by and be able to actually see the hope Dean still held for the two of them.

On his way home that night, as he passed Dean's house (he no longer considered it his) he noticed something was different. The Christmas lights were gone, making the house just a little bit darker. Cas knew what that meant. It meant that Dean was starting to give up hope.

November:

After the Christmas lights disappeared, Cas made a point of driving by the house to see if any other lights went out. At first, nothing changed. They had been apart four months and Cas could feel the loneliness setting in. Despite everything, he missed his husband.

He couldn't bring himself to file for a divorce yet, and he knew Dean would never do it. He knew the end of their relationship would be up to him.

Cas had gotten so used to driving by Dean's and seeing the front yard lit up with the walkway lights that it shocked him when the yard was dark. The lights in the house were still on, but that was another light out. Cas knew it was his decision to leave and that he had told Dean he wasn't coming back, but it hurt to see Dean's hope dwindling a little bit more.

December:

Christmas came and went. It was the first Christmas the Novaks and Winchesters hadn't spent together in over ten year. Cas still went over to Dean's parent's the week before to give them gifts and wish them a happy holiday along with Sam.

The day after Christmas, the front porch light was turned off.

January:

Castiel hoped with the new year, happier times were coming. He was wrong.

Three weeks into January, neither the living room or dining room lights shined through the front windows anymore.

February:

"I can't do this anymore Balth. I miss him so fucking much. And every time one of those god damn lights go off I feel myself panicking because I know the hope of us being happy again is getting smaller and smaller. And I know that's my fault because I told Dean I wasn't going back, but, fuck, I want to go back so bad."

Balthazar and Castiel were sitting at a coffee shop one morning when Cas decided to finally tell someone how he was feeling.

"I can't tell you what to do, Cas. But you are still as miserable now as when you first left. You're not getting over him and I don't know if you ever will. I will tell you this though: if you go back to him, I won't hold it against you. I know how much you love him and how much it is killing you to be away from him. Ultimately, it's your decision." Balthazar had been the most understanding of how upset Cas was because of the turmoil.

"I know Balth. I just don't know what to do." Cas sighed and decided to give it one more month before he decided anything.

March:

Cas drove by the house on the way to his apartment from work.

The back yard light was now off. He made a last minute decision and pulled into the driveway. He used his key to get into the front door. Dean wasn't home. He went through the house and turned all of the lights back on before going to the garage. He pulled down the Christmas lights and put them back up on the house.

By the time he was done, the house was as bright as it had been that first night the Novaks saw it. He didn't want to be there when Dean got back, so he quickly left and went home.

One Week Later:

Everyday since Cas turned the lights back on, more lights appeared. Dean added an additional strand of lights around the porch railing.

The next day, the walkway lights were doubled. The day after that, the front light was replaced with flood lights, spilling light over the entire yard. This continued day after day and it made Cas smile when he saw it.

On Friday, when he got off work, he went straight to Dean's house. He pulled into the garage and walked into the house, not bothering to knock. Cas found Dean sitting in the study, untangling yet another strand of lights.

Chuckling Cas said "Where exactly do you plan to put those? And how have you not blown a fuse yet?" There was a smile on Cas' face but Dean didn't look up.

"I'm putting them on the bushes. Wait… Cas? What.. What are you doing here?" Dean looked equally hopeful and worried.

"Dean, I'm still mad at you. I'm still hurt. But I love you and I meant it when I said I want to spend the rest of my life with you." Cas took a step toward the other man.

"Cas, what are you saying?" Dean had dropped the lights and walked over to stand in front of his husband, hopeful.

Cas put his hand softly on Dean's cheek and whispered, "I'm saying I'm coming home."

 **Thank you so much for reading. I hope y'all enjoyed! Let me know what y'all thought!**


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